Are We Done Yet?

It's been a long, lonely week and I miss my Hubby.  When my Hubby began traveling for his job a couple years ago, he usually only had 2-4 trips per year, some of which we were able to make road-trips.  The travel policy at his company changed  and so Hubby's had to fly to almost all of his locations so that's hampered me from joining him more often than we'd like.  When he got his promotion over a year ago we knew his travel would increase and that it would be difficult, but neither of us had any idea just how difficult it would be.  Some weeks when he's away, particularly during the Abide season, I'm fine and do well with him gone.  This week is not one of those type of weeks.

The house just seems so empty and even though I have scads of things I could (and should) be doing, I find myself wandering around, restless and feeling somewhat lost.  I miss my best friend when he's not here!  I hate that I only get to talk to him if I'm lucky, 10 minutes a day.  Finally I'm on the same page with him and look forward to the day travel is a minimal part of his job.

Until then... I keep praying for him (and us) and pushing on with the things I've got to do here at home while he's away, like get the license plate stickers for the vehicles (my big "task" for the day today!).  I'll keep figuring out what God wants me to do with the time I've been given and hopefully more days than not, I'll actually accomplish those things.  I will revel in the brief moments I have my Honey home with me, making his time here a place of solace and refreshment.  That  means that I need to lift him up and not nag or say things about how much he's working.

It's a new dance we've been learning the past few years.  A dance that requires balance and patience.  A dance that sometimes has it's own "solo" parts... a dance in some ways we weren't fully prepared to dance.  My big question is though, Are we done yet?


Enough of that wallowing in self-pity tonight.  On to the 30 Day Photo Fun challenge.  Today is...

Day 8 ~ Sunset

Last Night's Sunset

Yesterday afternoon, while I was taking my Day 7 picture, I peeked ahead to today's photo challenge topic and thought that I'd better think ahead.  With the strange weather we've been having lately, I wasn't convinced  that if I left my shot for tonight, that I'd find a sunset and I was right.  Last night, while the sun was getting ready to hide behind the houses across the street, I grabbed the camera and took this shot.  I got a strange orange ball reflection somehow, but nevertheless, there is my sunset shot!

Sweet 16 and Every Day Kissed

Today is a day of reflection and celebration.  It was precisely 16 years ago this moment (as I type this) that a young(ish) 30 year old woman and her Mother, Sister and BFF were making their way to the hairdresser with flowing white veil in hand.  They laughed and chattered while Marilyn quickly made up these women into visions of beauty, not that they weren't already of course!

The young bride and her BFF were last to get their "do's" done and they made it back to the bride's parents' home just as the photographer arrived.  Literally jumping into her silk gown, the young bride started off her wedding day with a smear of lipstick on her otherwise pure dress.  Oopsie! (Is that some sort of good luck charm?)  Pictures were taken.  Memories were made.  It wasn't too long before the bridal party hopped into cars on their way to the church where the bride's Prince Charming awaited.

Upon arriving at the church, the bride was awakened to her tremendous fear of commitment but held gripped tightly to her Daddy's suit sleeve as she walked down the aisle to the strains of classical music she wore a plastered on smile while thoughts of becoming the Runaway Bride flashed in her brain.  All that ceased though, the minute the bride took the groom's hand and walked up the steps to the pastor.  Then, magically, as if no one else in the world existed, the bride promised her heart to the one who'd stolen hers only 10 months prior.

The young couple vowed to love, honor and cherish one another until death separated them.  Once their golden rings were firmly in place, the wedding license signed and the kiss that sealed the deal was placed gently upon one another's soft lips, the young couple began their descent down the church aisle as Mr. and Mrs.

With the guests gone, the gifts unwrapped and their tan marks (and allergic reaction to shell fish) from Aruba fading, the young couple settled into their new life together with all the hopes and dreams of every newlywed couple... babies.  But for this young couple, that dream wasn't to be.  The next decade would be filled with tears and frustrations, sickness and heartache, yet the young couple would not allow for any of that to break down the bond of love that God had placed within their hearts.  They were a team.  Through thick and thin, "sickness and health", "in good times and bad" they were determined to weather the storms of life... and they did.

Today, sixteen years later, the no-longer "young" couple are more in love than ever.  They have come to a peaceful place with their disappointments in the inability to expand their family.  They have instead chosen to embrace their family of two which allows them more time and energy to focus on their love for one another and extended family and friends.  They have treasured the life God gave them as a couple and don't look back on the "what might have beens" of  the past.

Today, the couple celebrate love and a life well lived together and they anticipate a bright and love-filled future all the while praising God for the gift of one another.

Happy Anniversary to my Sweet Hubby!  Thank you for the best 16 years of my life!  Can't wait for the next 16+.

Waiting at the back of the church with Dad

Phew... it's official!  We're Mr. & Mrs.!

Greeting guests in the Receiving Line

Mmm... sharing our first piece of the 

delicious cake my Mom made

The Long Road to My Daddy!

This morning I was up shortly after 7am (a never heard of thing on a Sunday morning).  I watered my gardens, threw the freshly washed (time-delayed) load of towels into the dryer, packed the cooler while Hubby woke up and got ready.  Our goal was to be out the door by 8:30 so we could make the 2+ hour trip north to the chapel my Dad and Stepmom "G" attend, and to spend Father's Day at the Lake with them.

My Dad!!

The road to my Daddy has been a long one... not only today, but the past 45 years.  My relationship with Dad was quite a tumultuous one, particularly in my late teens and early 20's.  One might call me a free-spirit but Dad found me quite rebellious during those years.  When he'd say "stop", I'd say "GO".  If he saw something black, I'd see it white.  We were like opposites that were in fact cut from a similar cloth, yet came at things from different angles.

I spent most of my younger years pushing his buttons.  I recall many times Dad would quote the verse from Ephesians 6:1, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." (NIV) as he desperately tried to get me to lean towards his direction.  My response usually was quoting Ephesians 6:4 back to him, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children...".  It was a constant battle of wills in those days.

Then I grew up, much to his delight.  As I matured emotionally, I also grew spiritually and asked God to help me see my Dad as he saw him.  God showed me that my Dad loved me, despite his inability to express it verbally.  He drew me to my Dad's humanness and that he was still a work in process, and a product of his parents' humanness, as was I.  The Lord taught me to forgive my Dad for not being the Dad I needed, and He taught me to love my Dad for the dad he was:  a great provider, lover of my Mother, and the fact that Dad gave me the greatest thing he could... a spiritual foundation and godly home.

It wasn't until after my Mom died that my Dad began to transform into the Dad I had needed all those years  before.  Heartbroken and wiser, Dad began to verbalize to his six children his love for us and walls of regret came tumbling down on all sides.  The more I got to know this "new" Dad, the more I grew to love him, honor him and delight in him... and subsequently, my love for my "other" Daddy, God, grew deeper and closer as well.  I hadn't realized that I needed to lose my Mom, in order to get the dad I'd always dreamed of.

Driving two hours one way to visit my Dad was not a chore.  We knew it would mean the world to him for at least one of his kids to spend time with him on Father's Day.  Hubby and I being childless (and Hubby's Dad already in Heaven) makes it easy for us to escape the city and be with Dad.

We arrived at the small country chapel they attend up north shortly before 10:45.  Dad, surprised to see us, enveloped us in a big hug as we squeezed into the row alongside him.  I'm not sure if "G" told Dad we were coming or not.  No matter... his delight was apparent and our mission was accomplished!

After the service we enjoyed a delicious pork roast lunch "G" served for us and then Hubby and I dished out the dessert we'd brought with us:

Raspberries, Blueberries & Strawberries 

over Angel Food Cake w/ real Whipping Cream

Dad recently found out he has Type 2 Diabetes (a very mild case at this point) so we thought this was a good dessert to sneak in for his Father's Day celebration without too much craziness to his diabetes.  The afternoon was spent chatting and enjoying our dessert with a cup of Earl Grey tea.  While Hubby went for a long swim in the lake, "G" and I snuck a peek into my Mom's old cedar chest where I found some old pictures of Dad and Mom from their honeymoon and first few years of marriage.  I decided to bring them home to scan them as well as a "truckload" of other pictures Dad had.  Should be a fun week walking down "Memory Lane" with all Dad's pics!  By 6pm Hubby and I were back in the SUV and headed home with warm feelings of a day well spent.

Yep.  It's been a long road to my Daddy but I'm so glad I made the trip... not only today but over the past couple decades.  He's 80 this year.  He won't be with us forever, but these memories I've been making with him over the past few years will carry me through after he's gone.  I'm so thankful for the Dad my Father in Heaven gave to me... and it is an honor to honor him on this special day.  Thanks Dad!  I love you with all my heart!

Red Hot Monogamy

So... did I catch your attention with the title of today's post?!

Hubby and I just arrived home from a full day marriage seminar at our church, entitled "Red Hot Monogamy".  As couples, we went through a DVD series by Les and Leslie Parrot dealing with some of the issues that arise in marriage that couples want to deal with, preferably before they say "I Do" but most certainly will need to once into marriage.  Hubby and I had been asked by one of our pastor's to be facilitators of a small group.

The day went quickly as we hopped from watching the DVD segments, did the exercises in the booklet as a couple, and then broke into small groups to discuss the issues.  We started off with the "myths of marriage".  For those of you married, can you remember the "myths" you believed before you entered marriage?  One of the myths mentioned on the DVD was that we expect our spouse to "complete" us.  I blame the movie "Jerry Maguire" for that one!  Ultimately, my spouse is supposed to "compliment" me and not "complete" me.  Only God can complete me... and we know He won't be done that job this side of Heaven!!

I think the biggest thread that weaved through everything we discussed today was the importance of communication.  In order to co-exist peacefully we need to be able to speak in a way that our spouse can understand what we're saying, and we need to drop our unrealistic expectations, voicing in humility and grace where our needs are not being met.  We need to disagree fairly and respectfully.

Marriage is hard work. No doubt about it.  But, I don't think it's supposed to FEEL like such a tedious and arduous job.  As Christians, a godly marriage should have God as the anchor and foundation.  I  believe, as we grow in shared faith as a couple, allowing Him to refine us individually, marriages flourish.

Each couple was given a potted Hyacinth.  This fragrant and beautiful plant was a reminder of what our marriages can be.  Sometimes it is the work underground, out of sight, that God does within us that nourishes us and allows us individually and as couples to "sprout" and eventually bloom into a sweet aroma of love and companionship.  Like these bulbed plants though, we may go through times of dormancy, but with the proper nurture and care, in time we can blossom again.

Spending a day with my Hubby, focused on our marriage, is always fruitful.  I feel so blessed to have a godly husband and best friend.  When we are emotionally and spiritually in sync... oh my... that red hot monogamy is the icing on the cake!

Week Full of Family

Helloooooo dear friends out in Blogland! I'm home and almost settled in before I soon must pack my bags and take off again. Where do I even begin to update you on what's been going on this past week? (You may need to grab yourself a large glass of lemonade ... or your favorite beverage ~ preferably caffeinated).

Since my last "real" post, we have had our fill of family fun, starting on Saturday, July 25th with a family get-together at our place. My sis from NC, her hubby and youngest daughter made the trek up and so hubby and I opened up our little abode for whoever of our family could make it to come visit with C, D & J. Here's a pic of who was able to attend ... and 18 were absent from this photo op!

Monday (July 27) was the big Bachelorette finale so I told my sister I couldn't leave for the cottage (Dad's place on the lake) until after the finale! I won't go into huge detail as you can find what happened at nauseum online but I will say that even though she didn't pick "my guy", Reid, it sure was romantic to see him come back and try and win her heart in the 11th hour. I believe she was truly torn about what to do because I think her feelings for him ran deeper than she even realized. She may be engaged to Ed, but I honestly don't think she'll soon forget the magical connection she had with Reid. I personally think she should have chosen no-one that night and taken her time to sift through her feelings because she was obviously conflicted and confused when he too got down to propose. Her little fingers were wriggling away to grab him and the ring but she talked herself out of making too rash a decision in that moment. (I think she should have gone for it!! Sometimes love doesn't make sense and you just have to jump!) Anyhoo... they may ask Reid to be the next Bachelor and if that's the case... the obsession will continue for at least one more season, sad to say!

Back to our regularly scheduled blog post though...

Tuesday morning, C, J & I packed up her SUV (along with Buddy the dog) and head up to Dad's.

Dad and "G"

My brother and his family were also up at the lake so we had lots of fun visiting and hanging out with them. Although I had to spend some of my time working on my writing assignment, we also got in some time playing games like Dominoes, Dutch Blitz and Rummikub.

During the day we were either out in K's boat:

K in his boat

... heading to the Marina for candy...

J, S & Buddy

tubing...

S, L & N on the giant tube

spotting...

Me spotting the tubers from the front of the boat

kneeboarding...

N taking a ride behind the boat

or just going for a ride...

K, J, C and Buddy (with the tubers in the distance)

Fortunately the rainy weather left a day or so after we arrived so we could get out there and enjoy our surroundings, whether in kayaks...

C & I kayaked around a couple islands

peddleboat...

J & C peddleboating in the afternoon sun

or hiking down the lane to the nearby Falls...

Hanging out by the Falls

N playing in the Falls

Evenings around the cottage were fun. One night K took us for a boat ride at sunset...

and two of our three nights we sat by the campfire... being eaten alive by mosquitoes!

Campfire Girls

Campfire Boys... and J

L brought the goodies for us to make S'mores so we of course worked at roasting the perfect marshmallows...

J & I roasting the perfect 'mallow

Mine on the left looks like a chef's hat

On one night, after our campfire and rowsing game of Dutch Blitz in the cottage, C, J, S & I head outside to lay on the dock looking up at the stars. There is nothing like looking at the galaxy of God's handiwork from this place... there were SO many stars that almost every piece of sky was covered with twinkling lights. You could even see the milky way streaking across the night sky. We saw a few shooting stars which always amaze me. In the city we barely see any stars so this is even more brilliant for me.


There's always time at the cottage for a bit of fun and silliness...

My new lips... thanks to Babybel cheese!

And family bonding is of upmost importance...

Dad bonding with his furry grandson, Buddy

K with his furry little girl, Jazz

Sitting with J and Buddy on the dock

But all good things must come to an end and Friday evening C, J, Buddy & I repacked the SUV and head back to my place, but not before a Sibling/Nibling photo op...

Thanks for the fun time guys!

Saturday, C and D (who flew back to Canada after working all week) were off to a wedding so J & I hung out watching Pushing Daisies DVDs (which we'd watched during the week at the cottage). Sunday, they packed up their SUV one last time and head to my sister's for a BBQ with other family members (some of who couldn't make it to our party the weekend prior) and they head home Monday morning from D's sister's home. It was a great visit and in just a few weeks they'll be hosting us down in NC!

Obsession

Well, first off... glad I'm not alone in the "what were they thinking?" post from the other day. While wandering around the world wide web the past two days (why I'll explain in a few minutes), I came across an article talking about Bruce Jenner and his displeasure with his plastic surgery job.

Check him out here

I shake my head! Tsk tsk... when will we learn that God doesn't goof up on the way He made us! But enough about all that.

I have other things on my mind these days. I wish it was more godly and virtuous and I could tell you that I am spending 12 hours a day with my Bible in my lap, pouring over insight into making the world a better place but unfortunately I can't... at least not today. No... I am a madwoman. I'm obsessed by a t.v show and I can't stop sleuthing, searching, re-watching past episodes. It's actually sick and I can't believe I'm actually telling you about it but here goes...

I am a hopeless romantic and horribly addicted to The Bachelor/Bachelorette series on ABC. I have been since the first episode although some seasons I have skipped out on. After so many failed attempts at finding "the one" a hopeless romantic can only take watching so many train wrecks. But this season, I watched with great anticipation as my favorite contestant from last season's The Bachelor, fellow Canadian Jillian Harris, became the one seeking love. Jillian was given 25 original suitors and then 5 "extra" hunks came to join her. This spunky cutie had the cream of the crop of men to choose from this year and one in particular caught my eye from the start. He wasn't shown as a forerunner much at the start, but Reid, the quiet, quirky, witty and handsome realtor from Philly not only caught my attention, but more importantly Jillian's. Sure there is Ed, the Microsoft guy from Chicago that left and came back (which I'm SURE the producers had a huge hand in since I find it remarkable that he is the only one with outside contact getting a call from his boss that his job is on the line... ya sure!)... and there's Kiptyn, the "perfect" hunk with the washboard abs from San Diego... but Reid... Sigh... when he and Jillian were on the screen sparks flew like the 4th of July.

Skeptics might think it impossible for people to fall in love and get engaged in 6 weeks, especially while dating other people. I for one totally think it's possible (although maybe more difficult with cameras in your face and producers "scripting" a storyline for entertainment purposes). My hubby and I had a bit of an interesting start when after our first date he started dating another woman. Even after our first date I KNEW he was "the one" and went so far as to pick my engagement ring while he was dating the other woman. I knew he'd be back so I let him go and "get her out of his system" as I encouraged him to do that night he told me. They dated for a few weeks and then after God intervened miraculously, they broke up and we began dating. Less than one month after that, hubby (who had met my parents for 10 minutes only 3 weeks before) asked my Dad for my hand and 8 months later we were married. So I for one believe that it "can" happen as it did for Trista and Ryan on the first Bachelorette show.

Back to Jillian and her quest. As I watched over the past few weeks I saw a love story developing between her and Reid (in fact I saw it right from the get go before other people even noticed him). The way they looked at one another, the comfort with which they talked, the laughter and playfulness... it all seemed as it should be when you've found your soulmate. But then on Monday's episode, because Reid couldn't verbalize the actual "L" word and vow to propose in a week, Jilly let him go, even though she looked like she was heartbroken beyond belief. I think I was just as heartbroken as Jillian when Reid got into the limo to begin his "diary of the departed" (which I might add seemed to hint that he'd come back to profess his love which he felt but couldn't say).

Here's where the obsession comes in. In other seasons, such as last year when Jason let Jillian go at #3 when I thought they had the real thing (chemistry) I shrugged it off as his loss - big deal. But this year... I can't let it go. I am obsessing over the message boards, watching interviews Jillian's given for clues, rewatching every episode on YouTube... it's pathetic really! What is wrong with me?? lol

As I've been pondering this sick addiction I have, (not to mention sharing all this with hubby at naseum) I think it boils down to the fact that having found my soulmate in my hubby and knowing you can do so in a short amount of time at 30 yrs old (which both Jillian and Reid are), I crave for others to find their soulmates too. So when I saw Jillian (again who I'm 100% routing for to find real love as she is NOT like the other people who come on the show to make it in Hollywood) and Reid together, I saw that soulmate connection and I desperately want them to have a happy ending like hubby and me. It's like I can't accept Jillian with anyone BUT Reid. (Like I have a say in her love life but you can see where the obsession part is really shining through huh?)

What makes it even worse is that the previews and rumors out there are that someone Jillian found difficult to let go (Reid) comes back to propose so my hopes in a happy ending are still alive which fans the flames of my obsession. However will I make it to July 27th's finale sane (or without watching all 9 episodes 10 more times)?

There you have it! Don't judge me! Stop laughing and rolling your eyes! I'm sick! I need help! Pray for me... please!

The Joys and Frustrations of Being Married to a Phlegmatic

I love my hubby more than words can say. I love everything about him from his gentle nature to his passion for Jesus Christ. I love the way he loves me and how he has shown me more about God's love and grace than anyone else. I love his heart that has such compassion for others. But his temperament... Hmm. Do I love that? I do but there are tremendous joys and frustrations with it!

My hubby is highly phlegmatic. What's that you ask? Here is a perfect description of my hubby's strengths HERE. In fact, my hubby is textbook Phlegmatic temperament and it sometimes drives me CRAZY!

On the upside of his temperament he will never make a snap decision that we will regret forever. He weighs every decision he makes very carefully and prays about everything so as to not make a move outside of the will of God. This is good. I never have to fear him getting us in over our head financially or otherwise.

But the downside of his temperament is that he moves like molasses! (Read HERE to see phlematic weaknesses) About 8-10 years ago we had the opportunity to purchase our "dream" house at a reasonable price but hubby wasn't willing to step out and take a risk even though the payments would be exactly what we're paying for our present home. Those same houses have gone up double in value over those years and now we couldn't afford one unless I went back to work full-time with a high paying job.

My temperament has some phlegmatic but I am mostly sanguine (strengths defined HERE and weaknesses HERE). Hubby's need to process everything with a fine tooth comb can make me in sane. It makes me feel like I'm living on a roller coaster ride and today, I just want off the ride!

Here's the 411 on what's making me nuts tonight. As you know from my weekend post we spent ALL DAY Saturday out test driving cars and "crunching numbers" with the salespeople. We have also been back to the Auto Mall Monday afternoon, Tuesday afternoon and now Wednesday afternoon. Have we purchased a car yet? No. Have we narrowed down our choices? Yes. Have we driven the salespeople around the bend with our indecision? Most definitely! Will we be buying a car soon? I'm not sure!

What???? you're probably wondering. Well, after all of this (which NONE of it was my idea), hubby is thinking that perhaps his 212,500km Protege has some life left in it and we should hold off. Fine! But he hasn't decided that. What he does keep "reminding" me is that if I went back to work we could afford it. I have mentioned in about 100 different ways that I am not opposed to going back to work part-time but I don't want to get locked into a situation like my last job where I lost myself and became depressed. I don't want to get locked into a position so I can't travel with him anymore but I am ready to get out of the house and try a new, "temporary" or part-time challenge. I can't do it today though. I can't go tomorrow. I can't even go most of June because of puppy sitting and baby sitting stints I have coming up. I don't know what else to tell him!

He is not pressuring me to go to work mind you at least not outwardly. He tells me the decision is all mine BUT if I want to move or have a car when his dies then I will have to get out there and work. I am confused. My brain feels scattered and my heart hurts from the events of this past week. I honestly feel like I've just been through the spin cycle in the washing machine. It's crazy!

I respect my hubby so much and KNOW that every decision he makes is what he feels is best for us but sometimes I wish he wouldn't have pulled me into this. I really could have done without my hopes being raised high in the sky with a beautiful new car (with a sunroof to boot!) only to have him now back peddling in his decision. I just want to say forget it & we'll stay status quo once again. I'm tired of hoping for change in our life only to never make any kind of move forward. And honestly, I feel like everything (a house, a car) rests on me getting a job. I'm weary!

Sorry for the rant but this has weighed heavy on my heart ever since we got home from the Auto Mall today. One of hubby's co-workers was telling him our buying a car was a stupid decision when we really want a house. The problem with that though is that there are no homes in the price range we can afford that are worth moving to and what's the point of moving to somewhere else if it's not what you want? Is your life this complicated and frustrating? Am I being unreasonable? Am I wanting things that just aren't possible? How do make it work with kids AND being home? I can't even imagine all of this with kids in the picture!

Thanks for indulging me tonight. I'm sure tomorrow's post will be less stressful! I leave you with one thought though... How did this hubby of mine decide to propose to me after only weeks of dating?? That was TOTALLY a God thing!

Remembering Moms

Mother's Day 2004 was the first Mother's Day without my Mom. Not being a Mom and not having a Mom, the day became a "non-holiday" for me and for the first couple of years I completely boycotted the day. It was just too painful for my heart to endure so that first year I shut myself up in my house away from all the joy outside my door. My second (or third) Non-Mother's Day I went to my Mom's graveside with my journal in hand. I knew of course SHE wasn't there, but it still felt comfortable to be there where I knew her body was. Strangely comforting really.

The following year, a young single woman in our small group at church, had lost her Mom of cancer. I didn't really know her but I now knew the black hole of grief and so I offered to spend her first Mother's Day with her, taking her down to Niagara-on-the-Lake, a quaint village just west of Niagara Falls, Ontario. She was delighted to have a diversion from her grief which was fresh and we enjoyed a day of lunch, strolling the shops and meeting her parents' favorite artist, Trisha Romance at her gallery. It was a very special day and I was glad to help her through the hardest one.

After my Dad remarried in 2007, Mother's Day had "life" again as my Step-Mom filled some of that gap left from my Mom's absence. I didn't expect that at all and at first felt like I was cheating on my Mom but as I reflected on where my Mom was and what she was doing (in Heaven), I'm sure she wouldn't mind me showering love on G.

This year, after our time with my family on Friday night at the play and DQ, hubby and I spoiled his Mom for Mother's Day. Hubby BBQ'd a delicious feast of salmon, ribs and steak for dinner with grilled veggies and pastry treats for dessert. He picked his Mom up a lovely plant and brought me home a gorgeous arrangement of flowers from "the boys".

My "Boys" and my MD flowers

Now for those of you just getting to know me, may I clarify? I am not delusional... okay, maybe just a little. These 3 Snoopy dogs are our "children" so to speak. As God shut the door to both having our own children and to adoption, these 3 little stuffed dogs filled a huge void in both hubby's and my lives. They became our travel mascots, our "boys" and a strange, small little way for us to feel "normal" amidst the different-ness of our life. We KNOW they aren't real. Honest! They just add a little fun into our lives and we've now sucked most of our family and a lot of friends into our little delusion. Wanna join us?

Anyhoo... back to "real" life... Hubby's Mom spent the weekend. We watched movies Sat night and Hubby made us a French Toast breakfast Sunday morning. We spent the Mother's Day puttering about enjoying one another's company. I think Mom H had a great celebration!


Although I haven't had a ton of time to sit quietly and reflect on my Mom this Mother's Day weekend, I often think of my Mom, remembering what a great woman she was. She left behind so much of her in each of her 6 kids and although her body wore out long before it's time, the legacy of love and inner beauty she beheld will carry on through her children and grandchildren for years to come. I still miss her greatly, but I am so thankful that she is out of pain and with her Lord! What more could any of us want for our loved ones?

So as we put Mother's Day 2009 in the history books, I leave you with my favorite picture of my Mom in memory of what a great Mom she was to me and my siblings. We love and miss you Mom! See you someday!

My Mom 1931-2003

Kids Say the Cutest Things

I've been housebound a lot this week. First, it was the rainy weather on Monday and trying to get my Book Club book read each day. Then AF hit on Wednesday. Who invented peri-menopause by the way? Oh ya... God did... and it's ALL EVE'S FAULT I might just add!

Anyhoo... I've been sidelined with brutal cramps for the past 3 days but had to venture out yesterday to lead my small group at our Ladies' group at church and do grocery shopping in the afternoon. My poor hubby was dying for yogurt and was ready to head out late on Wednesday night for some. "Hang in just one more day" I begged him.

This morning, even though I'm still feeling gross and crampy, I knew I needed to head out to deliver a birthday card to my friend and pastor's wife, A's little 6 yr old son. Our small group was cancelled on Wednesday so the pastor and his family could celebrate son #3 on his actual day. "Auntie Sue" was delinquent and didn't get his card to him in time.

As I drove up this morning, A & E (6 yr old) and M (2 yr old) were out in front of the house playing "T-ball" at the end of the driveway. M is hysterical. He turned 2 in Nov and about 2 months ago found his little voice and is talking up a storm now. At his turn at bat he would place the ball on the top of the "T" and with the bat upside down, he would whack at the stand. The ball would plop off in front of him.

I stood chatting and playing with them for awhile and then decided it was time to finish the rest of my chores on my little outing. As I head back to my car I hear this little voice, "I Wuv You". I look around. A asks, "Did you hear that?" "I did! I love you too, M", I reply. As I pull open the door on my little red Civic, again he calls out, "I Wuv You". I repeat it back to him again. Can I just say... that TOTALLY made my day!

There are some days that God just totally blesses my socks off in the kid department. Knowing that not having children of our own was God's plan for us, can sometimes leave us feeling a little "empty" in the love department. Hubby and I love each other hugely, but as all you parents know out there, there is nothing that melts the heart faster than a precious little one snuggling up to you and telling you they love you.

God is so gracious and good. Even when He chooses to leave a womb and arms empty, He brings someone in to fill some of that void. Part of that though I believe comes from accepting God's plan for your life and embracing the opportunites He presents to love others.

God didn't call hubby and I to raise children of our own (through birth or adoption), but He has allowed us to help our friends and family in the raising of their children and at times, like this morning, He allows us little glimpses of those precious "Mommy" times!

"Amazing" Day

It was a perfect day for a race... "Amazing Race" that is.

This afternoon as the clear blue sky and late winter sun shone down upon me, I stood in the school yard, with my yellow and red flag blowing in the light breeze. I was in charge of a detour... "Throw At" or "Throw Up". Which would you choose?

Today was my friend's 10 year old son's birthday party. The theme, if you haven't guessed, was a recreation of sorts of one of our favorite shows, The Amazing Race. 3 teams of 4 boys and 1 adult set off from my friend's home in different directions in their neighborhood, fulfilling tasks and answering clues along the way. The goal... to be the first one to the "pit stop" back at the "mat".

My detour gave the boys the choice: either throwing 10 balls at the target on the back of the baseball screen OR eating an unknown jar of baby food. Now as Phil would explain it, throwing the ball would take more skill, but the baby food would be quicker. Guess which task the boys chose? Yep! All three teams chose to do the "manly" task of pitching the baseball. Yep... testosterone kicks in VERY early it would seem!

Once they completed their task, I gave them another clue which sent them off in different directions. Some would go to the corner store where they had to purchase something for $2.73 without going over, others had to run to the flagpole and sing "O Canada", carrying three different leaves they had found at an earlier task in the woods.

After my last clue was handed out I quickly gathered my box of baseballs and baby food and hurried back to the house where I became "Phil" and waited for each team to arrive on the mat where I would inform them of their position.

I was barely back before the first team came running up the sidewalk. "J's team" I said, "You are ..." I paused for effect" Team... Number... ONE! As the first team to arrive you have all won a delicious piece of... BIRTHDAY CAKE" The birthday boy's team cheered with excitement as the second team came screaming across the road, missing first place by merely seconds.

The third team found themselves way behind and finally came running down the sidewalk to the mat where I informed them that this was a "non-elimination round" so they too were invited to stay for cake!

I was exhausted when I got home and was chilled to the bone from standing out in the 32 degree weather for 90 minutes. It was great fun though and I was so excited to be a part of this fun day.

We have watched this 10 year old boy grow from the twinkle in his parent's eye when they were engaged, into a fine young man. He is a great "big brother" to his 3 younger brothers and this family is precious to us. It was such a treat for "Auntie Sue" to be included in this "Amazing" birthday party!

I'm so grateful to God for moments like this. Not having my own children to celebrate, I am particularly thankful for the friendship we have been able to hold on to with our pastor and his wife (the parents of this boy) even throughout our years of sorrow and their years of joy with 4 boys. We truly have become extended family and I just praise and thank God for these treasured friends!

Bachelor Blunder

I must begin today's post with a confession. Hi. My name is Sue and I'm a reality tv-aholic! Hubby and I have a terrible addiction of loving reality t.v. Not all reality t.v. mind you, but well... enough to classify as needing a 12-step program!

Last night, as many of you have heard, read or watched, was the Bachelor fiasco... I mean finale. Poor Jason, the divorced, single-dad of little Ty made the blunder of all Bachelor blunders. He picked one girl, proposed and then oops... changed his mind for the runner-up. Now, I don't want to judge the guy because a) I've never had the dilemma of being in love with 2 people at the exact same time or b) my hubby experienced similar confusion at the start of our relationship (more on that in a bit). I don't think Jason was wrong in having a change of heart but what I have issue with was if he was SO confused and in love with two women on the last day, WHY would he propose to one of them? That doesn't even remotely make sense to me! I mean seriously, if you watched the finale the guy is practically heaving over the balcony in tears after letting the runner up go. That reaction does not, to me at least, show that he is ready to make a commitment to another girl, asking her to become his betrothed.

As for the confusion, I get that. When I started dating my Sweetie, this other woman from church was interested in him too. She knew his twin sister and so she was able to hang out with them even though he had already asked me out on a date. After our first date he came to my apartment (with gifts in hand as it was Christmas time) and with great hesitation told me that he was going to date this other woman. Similar to Molly in last night's Bachelor show, I knew he was making a mistake and that he wouldn't be happy with his choice, but I told him to "go date her and get her out of your system". In my heart I knew he'd be back! (After he told me this news that evening we enjoyed a meal of Chinese take-out, watched "It's a Wonderful Life" and sat discussing how we would raise children ~ not your typical break up talk wouldn't you say?)

For my honey, it only took about 2-3 weeks for him to realize his heart was with me and a week after he broke things off with the other woman (actually she broke off with him for her own personal reasons~ which I believe was God giving hubby an out) we started to date. That was 15 years ago this past January and we have been happily together ever since! We ended up getting engaged after only a month of dating (2 months if you consider the month of December when we had our first date & second sort-of-date) and were married that October.

I believe the Bachelor show CAN work, but I honestly believe that the reason it doesn't work is that these guys are confusing "Lust" for "Love" and they get all caught up in 25 women throwing themselves at them and ABC lavishing exotic dates on them that only add to the "fantasy" world they live in for those 6 weeks. When reality hits, the couple haven't spent enough time getting to know one another over dinner and a movie or other "normal" dates. For poor Jason, I think he is so in love with the idea of love that he confused "passion" with substance, which I think he may have found in Molly and not Melissa (his first choice). I knew from the start unfortunately that if he chose Melissa for the "final rose" that it wouldn't last. All I saw was lust for the poor girl and not any real depth that would last beyond the cameras rolling. I'm sad to say I was right.

I just finished watching the second After the Final Rose and Jason said something that was key (and may actually be what makes him and Molly work out after all). He said Molly and he are becoming best friends and that she challenges him and makes him a better person. Isn't that what we all want? When it all boils down to it, if you've been married longer than a few years, the passion is great, but it's the best friend you want sitting next to you in a crisis or holding your hand when you're 90. I wish them luck because relationships are hard enough without having all of North America in on it!


Well... glad that show is over... for now. They just announced that fellow Canadian, Jillian is the next Bachelorette. Let's hope she keeps her head screwed on correctly during her season and finds the love of her life like Trista did!