Remembering Moms

Mother's Day 2004 was the first Mother's Day without my Mom. Not being a Mom and not having a Mom, the day became a "non-holiday" for me and for the first couple of years I completely boycotted the day. It was just too painful for my heart to endure so that first year I shut myself up in my house away from all the joy outside my door. My second (or third) Non-Mother's Day I went to my Mom's graveside with my journal in hand. I knew of course SHE wasn't there, but it still felt comfortable to be there where I knew her body was. Strangely comforting really.

The following year, a young single woman in our small group at church, had lost her Mom of cancer. I didn't really know her but I now knew the black hole of grief and so I offered to spend her first Mother's Day with her, taking her down to Niagara-on-the-Lake, a quaint village just west of Niagara Falls, Ontario. She was delighted to have a diversion from her grief which was fresh and we enjoyed a day of lunch, strolling the shops and meeting her parents' favorite artist, Trisha Romance at her gallery. It was a very special day and I was glad to help her through the hardest one.

After my Dad remarried in 2007, Mother's Day had "life" again as my Step-Mom filled some of that gap left from my Mom's absence. I didn't expect that at all and at first felt like I was cheating on my Mom but as I reflected on where my Mom was and what she was doing (in Heaven), I'm sure she wouldn't mind me showering love on G.

This year, after our time with my family on Friday night at the play and DQ, hubby and I spoiled his Mom for Mother's Day. Hubby BBQ'd a delicious feast of salmon, ribs and steak for dinner with grilled veggies and pastry treats for dessert. He picked his Mom up a lovely plant and brought me home a gorgeous arrangement of flowers from "the boys".

My "Boys" and my MD flowers

Now for those of you just getting to know me, may I clarify? I am not delusional... okay, maybe just a little. These 3 Snoopy dogs are our "children" so to speak. As God shut the door to both having our own children and to adoption, these 3 little stuffed dogs filled a huge void in both hubby's and my lives. They became our travel mascots, our "boys" and a strange, small little way for us to feel "normal" amidst the different-ness of our life. We KNOW they aren't real. Honest! They just add a little fun into our lives and we've now sucked most of our family and a lot of friends into our little delusion. Wanna join us?

Anyhoo... back to "real" life... Hubby's Mom spent the weekend. We watched movies Sat night and Hubby made us a French Toast breakfast Sunday morning. We spent the Mother's Day puttering about enjoying one another's company. I think Mom H had a great celebration!


Although I haven't had a ton of time to sit quietly and reflect on my Mom this Mother's Day weekend, I often think of my Mom, remembering what a great woman she was. She left behind so much of her in each of her 6 kids and although her body wore out long before it's time, the legacy of love and inner beauty she beheld will carry on through her children and grandchildren for years to come. I still miss her greatly, but I am so thankful that she is out of pain and with her Lord! What more could any of us want for our loved ones?

So as we put Mother's Day 2009 in the history books, I leave you with my favorite picture of my Mom in memory of what a great Mom she was to me and my siblings. We love and miss you Mom! See you someday!

My Mom 1931-2003